Mom insisted we should have an honor code. We would respect our dad because without him we would not have been born. We would be courteous, considerate of others and we would keep our troubles to ourselves because everybody has problems and they don't want to know about ours. If we look around, we can always find someone worse off than we are. Mom insisted we should live by the Golden Rule: Treat others the way you want to be treated.
Respect. That's what I've always wanted, to be respected. But it isn't something that is due us, a right. It is something we must earn. We earn respect through everything we say and do. That's a great lesson for young people, but how does it apply in the outside world?
The 1960s was a great time to grow up: the love generation. Or maybe as 1969 rolled around everything at our house was measuring up to the American Dream. Mom had always told me I could do anything I wanted, achieve anything I wanted to do if I was willing to work hard. It wasn't about biology, gender. It was about ability. And she believed I was loaded with ability, qualities I didn't consider special. Wasn't everyone like me? Wasn't I just human like everyone else? I really didn't think there was anything special about me. Besides, boys didn't like girls who were smart.
No, Mom said. I couldn't expect everyone to perform at the same level as me because everyone doesn't have the same abilities I do. I needed to be patient with those who aren't as capable as me. Some people misread me. They thought I was arrogant. (If they only knew!) But actually, don't my children deserve to have good things, too? What is different about their desires for their children and my desires for my children? That makes me arrogant? Oh, well. I digress.
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The late 1970s were...hm...well, I remember when the steel mills in the industrial heartland locked their doors. I felt terrible for the families who lost everything they had worked for all of their lives. I thanked God it wasn't us. Oh, but I--and many around me--was about to learn some valuable lessons in economics, things like "trickle-down" and "ripple effect." When the mills closed, all of the industry that relied on domestic steel was hit. Domestic steel couldn't match the affordability of the Japanese imports. (Thanks, Uncle Sam in Washington, for giving away the store.) By 1991, my husband's job was on its way to Romania in Eastern Europe. (And you thought the loss of jobs to overseas markets was something new in the new century.)
With no paycheck we couldn't spend. The stores, businesses and professions, with no customers, began to fade away. Population dropped from 112,075 in 2000 to 107,841 in 2010, according to the U.S. Census Bureau as of June 3, 2011. Some other data from the county's census report include: 84.5 percent of 25-year-olds and older are high school grads, 11.8 percent hold bachelor degrees. The per capita income (2009 dollars) is $19,785; median household income, $38,004. Persons below poverty level, 16.4 percent in the county (17,686) at a time when the state poverty level is at 15.1 percent. Women-owned firms in Columbiana County are 28.1 percent and 27.7 percent in the state. Of the $90,592,062 federal dollars sent to Ohio, only $755,832 of it came to our county (2008). The land area of Columbiana County is 532.46 miles. Population is 202.5 persons per square miles (2010).
Admissions at the Kent State branches in Salem and East Liverpool go up when jobs go down. But when they complete their education, do the students stay or do they leave to follow the jobs? It looks like they leave. And what does that do to the fabric of the extended family?
What does all of this have to do with respect? There are different forms of respect, the most important being self-respect because if you don't feel good about yourself, how can you see good in others or in the world around you? When the jobs went away, people were robbed of their self-respect when they could no longer take care of their families and their obligations. When they were told they did not qualify for foodstamps so they should buy food and not pay their bills--AND THEY WERE--how do you suppose they felt? What did they think? Feel? How did they respond?
Yes, this blog entry is all about respect when you read between the lines and walk in the other man's skin for a while.
Funny that I found this article just hours after writing this blog entry. Maybe you will want to check this out: http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/lookout/more-americans-chinese-t-put-food-table-132752601.html
Next time: To Kill a Mockingbird...What is Courage?
(c) 2011 Cathy Thomas Brownfield--ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Why am I so sure that someone somewhere on the planet will think the copyrights that belong to me don't apply to them? If you are interested in using my words, please contact me for permission.
5 comments:
You called the 60's the love generation. For me it was the era of muscle cars. Unlike many, I like smart women. But then again, I was more interested in cars than females as a teenager.
I agree with all that you've written. Well done my fiend!
Well said, Sis. One of the most amazing discoveries as I faced life alone was to realize that "as yourself" followed the Lord's commandment to "Love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and thy neighbor..." I don't know where that last phrase hid for all those earlier years. It's hard to love or respect others if you don't love and respect yourself. How'd you get so smart so young?
I think respect is a two-way street.I think all humans deserve a measure of respect just for being here,for having been born.Just being born means that each one of the six-billion of us deserve the basic right to exist and pursue our dreams.
No matter what our demeanor,or accomplishments, there will be people who will hate us and have no respect at all for our existing.
You fiends are awesome. Thanks for your kind words, Ron. Janet, I never was a kid. I was a grown-up little person. Until we moved to Spruce Street mostly I was around adults. Jay, you are absolutely right...Maybe I didn't say it right. And the most important part is about self-respect. Self-love...not narcissistic love, but enough concern for yourself that you can love someone else. Bless you all, my fiends.
Geez, Janet. I am not really all that young.
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